On Point

As if.

As if I ever stay on point.

What is the point?

Get to the point!

Stay on point!

OUCH! FUCK YOU!

It is not natural to stay on point. It is ego that pushes staying on point. If not the dancer’s ego then the ego of the teacher or parents.

But isn’t ego why we push ourselves in any endeavor?

Yes

Is ego bad?

Mostly.

In grade school I was the best at math, science, spelling, and almost anything except gym.

That made me egotistical.

I’m still egotistical.

BUT NOW I KNOW I AM NOT THE BEST AT THINKING.

But I haven’t given up at thinking either. I think about a lot of things.

It is better to look down a woman’s shirt than to see her boobs clearly.
It is better to watch a cancan dance than to see the undergarments without the dancing.

An emotional connection is the best ever.

A physical connection will do for the moment. Hey, masturbation doesn’t even require that. If you can at least help someone else to get off that should be a bonus. Think! They came because of what you did! Good job!!!

Was it the best cum of their life?

See! That’s where it all falls apart!

Would life be better as an incubus/succubus?

Wild

Anomalies

Do you ever find yourself thinking that so-and-so was really really hot. And then you look at the date it was made and realize that so-and-so is ancient if they are even alive.

Does that make a difference?

What difference does it make?

Now if you were paying attention the second question implies a positive response to the first question, and therefore one appropriate response might be “Fuck You!”

I like that. Stand up proud for how you feel.

However I am not like that myself. I find almost all fetishes interesting from an intellectual standpoint. Well what the Hell do you like, people might ask me. Being as much a part of your orgasm as I can be, would be my response. Being part of that moment when you go past the point of no return is what really gets me going.

So what does that have to do with anything?

Absolutely nothing!!!

Unless you like antique porn. Or you can imagine what it would be like to have sex with historical figures.

That is unfortunately one of my hangups.

Sexy silent film stars rock

modern dentistry helps

B.W.B. Babes Without Borders

I’m pretty much an equal opportunity ogler. There are people that are easy on the eyes in most countries. I certainly enjoy looking at them. A Miss Universe contest featuring only humans does seem a bit egocentric for the species though. It could be xenophobia I suppose. On Gilligan’s Island Gilligan managed to avoid trouble by picking Gladys. She was the only native.

There might be other natives in the universe. Would they be babes? What characteristics define a “Babe”? Well the word babe is closely related to the word baby. There is a survival benefit for babies to be cute. How many would be conceived or born if a mother’s reaction were “That ugly thing came out of me! It Hurt!!”

Babies like milk glands, mammalian ones anyway. Their fathers often like milk glands too. Sometimes politicians like milk glands. They even kiss babies sometimes. Some aren’t sure what they should kiss. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wilbur_Mills Or who they should kiss https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Sanford

It should be noted that if you tell your family and security detail that you will be gone hiking, you might want to pick some other time than nude hiking week. http://www.hikingnaked.com/index.php?topic=103.0;prev_next=next

Politicians aren’t always known for good decisions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uK8Iowe83-A
The blond behind Dean is pretty cute. The hearings interrupted my cartoons so yes I did watch the hearings despite being rather young. I started following politics after that. I have no idea if the blond aged well. Physical beauty is transient. Elizabeth Sladen was very pretty, but she’s been dead about 5 years so her appearance has suffered I’m sure. I’ll lose a lot of weight after I die, especially if my wife has me cremated. Celluloid lasts longer than people. http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0805207/?ref_=nv_sr_1 Recycling through the carbon cycle is independent of national borders but largely limited by planetary borders unless you are considering time scales large enough to say that we are all just “Star Stuff” to quote Carl Sagan.

So what makes a babe. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VMnjF1O4eH0

and that might trigger a Christmas wish https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AUZqfByAOUs

I have some different ideas. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pj-UqKjOwwo

Wild

I Attempted to Make a Bung Wrench. I Failed

Bung wrenches open bung holes. They are not medical devices. That is not speculation. That would just be speculums.

Ba-bum! drumbeat there

Opening drums is done by removing the bung from the bung hole. That is not always easy without a bung wrench. Now I wasn’t opening any drums the other day, but I was working on a Major Fawcett problem. My kitchen faucet was dripping and I decided to fix it. I’ll quote what I posted on Facebook.

Worked on a project today. My kitchen faucet has been dripping for awhile. If it’s not much it isn’t a big deal in Iowa. It just makes it that much less likely your pipes will freeze. The drip rate recently got worse and I decided to replace it. *I* had installed the current faucet myself 20 years and 6 weeks ago. Yes I know that. I’m kind of anal about record keeping. I looked at it. I went to Blains and bought a new one. Looking at it I remembered thinking that it would be a good idea to spend a little more and get a more solidly made one with more brass and less plastic. Today my thought was, the major part of this project will be getting the old faucet out. After that I should be able to install, clean it up and leak check in about a half an hour. I was absolutely right. The first three hours consisted of laying on my back in a mixture of windex, Mr Clean, floor soap, interspersed with holding tools in contorted positions with water, rust, lime scale, and tools falling on my head. The last half hour was installing and cleaning. The extra money I had spent on brass had ended up going for corrosion instead. That was one tough faucet to get out. I really don’t plan on living long enough to have to do it again. By then it would kill me if I wasn’t already dead.

So, what does that have to do with bung wrenches? The locking nuts on the bottom of the faucet had a shape that reminded me of bungs I had removed from barrels of other stuff. I don’t own my own bung wrench. I tried to cobble something that looked like a bung wrench. It did look right. But it was not strong enough.

I finished the job without having to fix any new leaks, no leaks runs or errors!

The next day my arms were sore any time I put my arms up over me. So I didn’t keep doing that. Some people put their arms up quite a lot. Some people are into BD/SM too. Not me though, it’s just not my thing. I have read about it and talked to a few people that were into it. I am into reading and talking. In the mid 70’s Club magazine had so-so pictorials but really weird articles. It provided a drastic stark difference between the people that said “I read it for the articles” and the people who ACTUALLY did read it for the articles. It was amusing to ask the former group if they had read Karl Steiner’s column. It didn’t matter which answer they gave I would ask them, “Well what’s his column about in that issue?” I almost always enjoyed that gag.

Karl Steiner is a very common name. I had trouble finding any references to quote. The following sites include the table of contents for various issues. Beyond that I don’t know much about them. On some pictures you can also read the cover headlines.

http://www.myerscollectibles.com/store/item/1d0vp/Mens_Magazines/Club_Magazine_Vol_1_1_February_1975.html

http://www.magizine.org/CLUBmagCLUB197603.htm

http://www.magizine.org/CLUBmagCLUB197606.htm

Wild

Paraphilia, Feel Ya Pair

As word play I realize that’s reaching. Inappropriate reaching is a paraphilia. I’m sure of it.

I’m a guy. Guy’s think about sex almost constantly. Today a coworker walked by and I thought, her tits didn’t used to be that big. I’ve known her 27 years. We’ve never worked the same shift, and I don’t know her real well. Like I said, I’m a guy. I’m going to notice the bounce. So then I wonder, are they real? In addition to being horny and aged, I can be philosophical. What IS real? Is a dildo or vibrator real? What about a cockring? Lingerie? Jewelry? If your nipples are pierced does that make them non-real? I once heard a psychiatrist on a telecourse that there were only so many orifices and protuberances on the body and nothing was as kinky as it’s practitioners thought. That’s not true anymore. People get body modification surgery and create new ones.

So what is really real. Probably whatever floats your boat. Adornment is intended to make you feel sexy. If you feel sexy others will probably find you sexy as well. If they don’t that’s their problem. If the adornment needs to be extreme, well, you might have issues. Some issues are collectables. The lady in question had breast cancer a number of years ago so maybe maybe she had some augmentation to feel better. That’s her business. If so, I hope it worked for her. I’ll appreciate the bounce for the same reason climbers go up Everest, because it’s there.

I could stop here. But wouldn’t it be fun to keep going?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_paraphilias

Quite the list there. Wow. All the bases are covered right?

Maybe.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_technical_terms_for_nonparaphilic_sexual_interests

Okay okay, maybe not.

I almost titled this “Money and Sex” I would have went here first.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lovemap

Sometimes I can’t help but get pervy.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perversion

What a way to end
Wild

Satyrical Post; Do Onions Affect Nymph Loads

Probably.

Curiosity has me wondering what kind of responses I would get if I left this as a one word post.

Nymphs are supposed to be female demigods so “Their” loads could refer a load of nymphs {how many nymphs can dance on the head of a penis}. It could refer to the loads inspired by them, either by quantity, or by quantity, or by quality. Quantity could refer to the number of loads donated. Quantity could refer to the number of donors.
Quantity could refer to the size of each donation.
Quantity could even refer to the number of donations per donor.

And then there is quality. Do you REALLY want to go there? Stay hydrated.

Are you SURE you really really want to go there?

Before 1970, yes 1970, ancient history to some, ancient history in terms of modern porn, yesterday to older folks, a second ago in the history of humans with porn, the term “Bukkake” referred to a method of cooking noodles by splashing them with hot water. It was a verb. Perhaps a re-verb if done more than once by musicians. Curious trains of thought derail and ask the question, I wonder if anybody has added cornstarch to loads to make real noodles? Some fake loads were made using egg whites and cornstarch. Raw, of course, actresses often grimaced when holding the mixture in their mouth.

Onion, a pungent tuber know for tricking readers, particularly enjoyed if they trick news people. I used to date a woman that always complained that I ate too many onions before a date. I would try brushing and mouthwash right before the date, but then I think she knew BECAUSE of the mouthwash. Years later, my wife would hate when I would pick a chive growing in the yard and eat it before kissing.

Wild

Deep Throat Tricky Dick Get a Plumber to Stop The Leak

I had debated saying something about the Flintstones having a Gay Ol’ Time. Not this time.

Deep Throat in this case has nothing to do with Linda Lovelace, it was a guy. He was sharing Tricky Dicky secrets. I mean Nixon. He’s the guy that started trade with China. I also find it amusing that Cartoon Network has a show where the good guy secret agents are plumbers. Yeah, that was Nixon’s idea too. Send the plumbers in to spy on McGovern. The problem was the coverup. Kind of like with Clinton. If he had just said, “yeah we had sex, go mind your own fucking business, we broke no laws.” They would have had no legal reason to impeach. Eventually they would have found or invented one. That’s how politics are played. Even though I was only 12 during the hearings that was my introduction to political thought. They interrupted my cartoons. It better be damn important. So I watched the hearings. I heard about G Gordon Liddy basically BBQing his hand to prove his loyalty {SNL did a skit}. And not too long after Watergate, you had Wilbur Mills and Fanne Fox{e} making the news. I think she was Argentinian. Maybe Mark Sanford would know. Chevy Chase claims he had injuries from impersonating Pres. Ford. Ford fell down alot {or so it seemed. I do remember seeing a pic of him sprawled on some stairs after he stepped out of a helicopter before it landed.

I guess that’s enough politics for now. I’d do Betty, I’d prefer Wilma, but she’d never leave Fred. Fran Smith wouldn’t be too bad. Peggy Hill {eh, maybe}, Lois Griffin {maybe}, Rocky the Flying Squirrel {hey, the voice is June Foray, a woman, course the character is also a squirrel, maybe Arch would do her.}

Deuces Wild, I see your One-Eyed Jack and Raise You a Queen

I follow a few blogs at various, not many, and not as many as I used to. And just because… I don’t think trademarking a common word should be allowed, so I won’t capitalize it and you can’t prove I wasn’t just using a word wit baad grammmur HA!

Okay, I was reading the blog of my friend that I’ve never met and who probably doesn’t like me, and I noticed a rather humorous statement that I simply could NOT let slip by. Paraphrasing what he wrote, he wanted to bed a royal at some point. He would be willing to go down to a Baroness, but he would prefer a Princess or Queen. Now this is on an adult dating site, one that also advertises itself as a swinger site. Get where I’m going? I commented to him that I had complete confidence in his ability to find a Queen there.

He had some other points in his post and I made quips about those too. And this was one of those rare occurrences where he did actually reply to me. But he didn’t reply to the Queen quip. It was said in fun, I’m sure he realizes that. I don’t get the impression that he dislikes me. I think he’s mostly just ambivalent. It is fun to try and get a reaction though. One time he wrote an entire post as a reply to my comments. I commented on that one too.

Time for work, gotta go, maybe I’ll have a hose story to tell.

Wild

Heil! Uh…. Er…. I mean Happy 420, and what about Try-Sexuals

On Family Guy they had an episode titled “Episode 420”. It was about pot. I didn’t get the reference so I goog1ed it. I guess it’s 4:20 somewhere. And that’s better than signifying the date. In addition to being close to Earth Day, April 20th was Hitler’s birthday. Probably the only people that remember that are either neo-nazis or law enforcement with the occasional historian thrown in. Family Guy refers to Hitler from time to time, including in Episode 420. I figure Seth McFarlane is probably the one who writes the song parodies. I do like the “Bag of Weed” song. Since I don’t see FG clips on youtube, they probably don’t share them. The music was from “Me Old Bamboo”, I wish I could dance like that. Lot of energy there.

Wild
Oh, almost forgot, try-sexuals, Isaac Asimov wrote “The Gods Themselves” and in it a group of aliens have three sexes instead of two. Yeah Yeah I know, I should call that TRI-sexuals then. But he has an incredibly erotic description of alien masturbation called “Rock-Rubbing”. It takes a leap of imagination to posit a third sex, a really dirty mind to picture alien masturbation, and a sicko like me to get turned on by it.

Oh My It’s Takei not tacky,The Big O, The Story of O, and J

I was perusing around Wiki and Youtube today. Anyone that reads much of what I write has to know I like a good laugh. George Takei has a really good sense of humor. Sometimes it seems like half of the jokes on facebook are credited to his page. He is getting a bit older, as most of us do, so he might be getting grey.

As a preteen I remember looking at some magazines that talked about “The big O”. With the 60’s being the era of “Free Love” and all, you wouldn’t think so many women would be so repressed about their own sexuality. It was a “Hot” topic at the time. These weren’t the nudie mags aimed at men. These were women’s mags, guy mags would have pictures. Sometime after that I read “The Sensuous Woman” again with no pictures! I was a teen by then, some pictures would have helped in my own research of the male orgasm. Still and all it gave me some miniscule insight into what women want. And they all want something different {Hm, I’m about as different as anybody and yet I’m not in demand}. I also read “The Happy Hooker” by Xaviera Hollander. When I started this post I decided to look up when Ms Hollander died. She hasn’t yet. She is 69, how’s that for a coincidence? The author of The Sensuous Woman was listed as J on the cover. All about O by J, not too bad to wake up to I suppose. Notice I did NOT say, “The Story of O”, that is altogether different. Not my cup of tea, but

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Story_of_O

From approx. 1974-78 Club magazine featured more or less normal pictorials, but some rather extreme writings. I won’t go into details, I don’t want anyone to hurl. That includes hurling objects at my head.

I don’t have a point in bringing these things up. Epee and Snee, one has a point and the other doesn’t. So is it blunt or dull? Are paraphilias less interesting if you use the big words?

Wild