Tag Archives: astronomy

Faerie Tails, Who Is The Fairest Of All?

Should I say something tack-ay? Actually I follow George on Facebook. He posts a ton of really funny stuff. Shall I start quoting? “I would prefer not to.” So said Bartleby the Scrivener. An interesting story and a couple of entertaining films. Who is the more curious character, Bartleby or the narrator? Bartleby is the epitome of passive non-compliance. The narrator prefers not to deal with his inertia. When faced with the immovable Bartleby the narrator is NOT an irresistible force. Crispin Glover was an excellent casting choice.


Ferry tales, Charon was the ferry-man who took people across Styx. During the time Pluto was a planet it was discovered to have a moon. The discoverer gets to name new stuff, but they are supposed to be theme consistent. So it was named Charon. I’ve heard a rumor that the wife of the discoverer was named Sharon. If there are no tails in that story I’m sure the group Styx had at least one groupie named Sharon.

There is a small galaxy near the Milky Way named Snickers.
Rules were meant to be broken.


Another Link In The Chain

I could go in sooo many different directions with that one. It could be like “Another Brick in the Wall” only darker, {Black Floyd?}. It could be whips and chains kinky. Or I could be cleaning a rifle thinking how nice it is to be at the top of the food chain.

I haven’t been hunting in almost 20 years. I prefer not to do much killing. If I can get meat in a store I really don’t feel a need to kill it myself.

But is that really better? It’s more sanitized for me, but factory farms aren’t particularly nice for the animals. Is it better from their standpoint to run around free until they happen to cross paths with a predator? Is being shot a more pleasant death than being eaten alive? Anybody who has watched a cat play with a small animal has to wonder. And what about injury and disease or starving to death? Kobe beef cattle live a pampered life I’ve heard. Drinking beer and getting massaged by Japanese people doesn’t sound so bad. Here in the States the animals raised as 4H projects are probably the best treated non-pets. They aren’t free to do what they want, but they are pretty comfortable. Pets have a relatively pleasant life usually. Certainly I would consider it more pleasant than NOT being a pet.

So how do we view that freedom as a human? You want the state to take care of you? If you’re born rich it’s unlikely your parents are going to let you starve or be eaten by predators. What’s that? We’re at the top of the food chain you say. Really? There might be some predators that haven’t heard that. But very few people get eaten in cities, at least in a non-sexual way. But some aspects of life in the herd or hood require a degree of cooperation. Free medical care, why would I want to pay for that? The same reason public health departments were created. You’re part of a herd not an individual on an island. An alpha individual might lead a herd for a while, but that never lasts. Sooner or later the alpha changes, and individuals on the way out don’t usually fare as well as the rest of the herd. In a perfect world you don’t have jealousy. In an imperfect one you have robbery, swindling, and exploitation because someone isn’t happy with what they have. You might share. They might not.

But let’s get back to that food chain business. The bird eats the ants. The bird dies. The ants eat the bird.

The herbivore eats the plants. The carnivore eats the herbivore {in a totally non-sexual way of course}. The carnivore dies and rots. The plants absorb the carnivore.

The sun runs low on hydrogen and goes into a red giant phases. The surface expands beyond the orbit of Earth.

Maybe I should go fishing instead?


It? It!?! IT!!! My Baby isn’t an IT!!!!

A quote from Jerome Klapka Jerome around 1890 to 1900. At that time he was lamenting the predicament a young man can find himself in when presented with a young mother and child. At that time they dressed babies, ALL babies, in white. There was no convention about blue and pink. He advised young men to NEVER refer to the child as it. If he calls the little boy her or calls the little girl him, the mother and accompanying women will simply smile at him as if he is an imbecile. If he should absently call the child it, fury from said women will be unleashed.

About ten years ago the wife of my coworker Dave had a baby. One night wife and child visited our breakroom so the ladies in the office could see the baby. A former coworker {she later quit, thankfully} was on break at the same time. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a woman with less maternal urges. She was visibly annoyed when the crowd started piling up. I happened to glance her way and saw her scowling. An “If looks could kill” type of scowl. No one else noticed. It amused me. Actually it amused me that she was basically always pissed off. And it was very easy to really get on her nerves. After she stopped talking to me I used to make it a point to walk by her and say Hi. She would never respond, and after a while stopped making eye contact. I was telling one of my other coworkers about it, and he gave me some advice that I started heeding. He pointed out that if she ever flipped out and started shooting, I might be high up on the list from those Hi’s.

I hear they might make a “Goonies II”. The one guy was described as an it. He was a good it though.

When I think of Tony Randall I think of Felix Ungar. I’m sure a lot of other people do too. I could compare and contrast the Greatest American Hero, and the Meadow Party’s presidential candidate. The first is William Catt, the second is Bill the Cat. When I moved to what basically amounted to a small farm in 1981 there was a cat that wandered in from the fields. It bore an uncanny resemblance to Bloom County’s Bill the Cat {thank you Berkeley Breathed}. It was orange and black, sort of, it had mange or something that caused a significant amount of fur loss. It was very friendly. It would wander by linger for a half hour or so then go back into the fields. While it was hanging around it would go from person to person and rub his neck on your lower leg. Then he would put his nose in the cuff and blow big wads of snot all over your pant legs. He was very friendly, but the world was his handkerchief. William Catt also made a movie called “House”. I enjoyed the movie, and I was expecting to watch it the first time I watched the show called “House” about the doctor.

Now for Mr. Throatwarbler-Mangrove pronounced “Smith”. That was Monty Python, nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition you know. The was also a sketch about Mr. Smoketoomuch. He enters the outer office and the receptionist, {played by the very busty Carol Cleveland} greets him by asking, “Are you here to book a holiday or did you want a blowjob?” They changed that line for American TV audiences. They didn’t think we could handle a blowjob.

Gotta love that Brit sense of humor. Jerome K Jerome’s writing style was similar to James Thurber’s. I don’t know if Thurber read J’s books or not. I was introduced to “Three Men In A Boat” thanks to Robert Graves. I watched Masterpiece Theatre’s “I, Claudius” back in the 70’s. I really enjoyed that. I decided to read the book. That was really good. I started reading all of Robert Graves’ books. Then I read “The Antigua Stamp”. Hated it. It pissed me off. Neither of the main characters was particularly likable. But when choosing between a malicious bumbling idiot and a malicious evil genius I have a modicum of more sympathy for the former. As a Southern friend of mine would say, “Bless his heart, he just don’t know any better.” It would seem Mr Graves disagrees with me. And he made fun of “Three Men In A Boat.” That was all the incentive I needed to read that book. It was hilarious. And not all that dated for being that old. It just goes to show that people are people regardless of their location in the space time continuum.

Plato had some unusual ideas about reality. The world we see is an imperfect image of the ideal. The ideal is the reality in a metaphysical bizarre sense. That would seem to make Platonic relationships even weirder. If it’s Platonic it’s strictly intellectual not sexual. That doesn’t really seem to follow. And it would make Plato’s Retreat positively boring if no one had sex. I wonder if they have Glory Holes there. Glory Glory Hallelujah, The Lord Has Cum. I know. I’m going to Hell for that one. Gotta find a Holy Man.


Flat Tax? Thumb Tacks? Just Plain Tacky? YES!! That Was It!

I got almost nothing done this weekend. Where does the time go. I’m behind on every blog I read now. The shows I usually catch up on through Hulu/Netflix remain unwatched. I haven’t posted in a few days. I haven’t done hardly any housework.

I really should give credit where credit is due. The last part of the title is a takeoff from Douglas Adams. The Captain of the B ark tells Arthur and Ford that the ship is programmed to crash, not land, and Ford says, “You’re all a bunch of useless bloody loonies!” The Captain says, “Yes! That was it! That was the reason!”

As for credit about not doing anything, that was due to me. I got lazy.

Curiosity might not always kill the cat, sometimes it baptizes it. At work our loading dock is not heated, but it still is protected by a sprinkler system. Since it does get chilly here in Iowa they fill those sprinkler pipes with compressed air and they only fill with water when the air pressures drops. Someone snagged a piece of equipment on a sprinkler and tried to force it out from under the sprinkler head. It snapped off and the two people in question were not in maintenance and not familiar with how the fire system works. They heard the air, they stood under it and looked at it. ……. Then they were blasted with nasty stagnant water that had been sitting in the pipes quite a while. I didn’t see it. I get along with both of them, but it would still have been hilarious to see them sprayed. It would even have been worth having to clean up the mess afterward. Even when you know where the cut-off is, an awful lot of water can end up on the floor before you get it shut off.

I mentioned this song to a coworker, and he didn’t recognize it. We sang it in music class quite a bit. I didn’t like it then, but it grows on you with time {a lot of things are like that, fungus, bugs, gross things, etc.}

A couple of things come to mind with this song. In Fahrenheit 451, all the houses have aerial antennas, except the house with the books{and the firemen start fires not put them out}. In this video the garage has a satellite dish, it looks like one of the old ones.

Perhaps this is the remnant of some bizarre childhood event, but I can’t help wondering what ticky-tacky is, and would it be fun to play with. Yes, I can be disgusting sometimes.

Speaking of that, it’s getting late I should go to bed now.



MYOB, from wiki QUOTE:
In the classic science fiction story …And Then There Were None, Eric Frank Russell shortened “Mind Your Own Business” to “MYOB” or “Myob!”, which was used as a form of civil disobedience on the planet of the libertarian Gands.[5] Russell’s short story, …And Then There Were None, was subsequently incorporated into his 1962 novel The Great Explosion.[dubious – discuss]

BYOB, bring your own bottle, could be booze, could be anything really.

GYNOB, Woman comes home and finds note on fridge, Someone from the Gyno Colleges called. They said your Pabst Beer was okay. Since when do you drink beer, and why didn’t you share?

Yeah it’s an old joke, but I’m an old jokester.

Carmen is an Opera, Karma can be a Bitch

But Karma is only a Bitch if you are. Got that from Facebook. Mentally I had a string of segues occur which ended with me thinking about this civilian working at Ft Benning. I probably wasted a good astronomical postcard, but it may have been worth it. She handled the paperwork for people outprocessing from the Army. I had heard she was a real bitch. In fact, I had never heard anything remotely positive about her. After she got done annoying me and I flew out of GA for the last time, I sent her a postcard. I didn’t sign it or put my address on it {I didn’t have an address at that time anyway.}. I mailed it from O’hare. It was a picture of the Andromeda Galaxy, on the back I wrote, “Wish you were here.” It amused me. It amused the people I’ve told about it. I don’t know if she “Got” it or not.

Opera’s tend to be tragedies, I don’t know much about Carmen. On Family Guy, Brian likes this woman’s aria “Habenera”, I don’t know if that is how you spell it. The word reminds me of Habenero which is a very hot type of pepper. Speaking of hot, Carmen Electra was pretty hot during the show Battlebots.

You don’t see her in that clip, but you can still think about her.

There was a woman that recently came out about what she did during WWII. She was one of 15 food tasters Hitler used. He was a vegan, but he did get the best veggies in Germany. And so did his tasters. People say that Hitler did get along well with children and animals. In the medical drama “House” there is a line in the first season I just love. Cameron is talking with Chase and he asks her if she’s been sleeping with House. She doesn’t answer and Chase makes the comment, “He’s not as bad as Hitler.” Cameron’s response is great, “I don’t sleep with someone just because they aren’t as bad as Hitler.” Priceless.

Not really, I’m sure the writers were paid for that line.

Heil! Uh…. Er…. I mean Happy 420, and what about Try-Sexuals

On Family Guy they had an episode titled “Episode 420”. It was about pot. I didn’t get the reference so I goog1ed it. I guess it’s 4:20 somewhere. And that’s better than signifying the date. In addition to being close to Earth Day, April 20th was Hitler’s birthday. Probably the only people that remember that are either neo-nazis or law enforcement with the occasional historian thrown in. Family Guy refers to Hitler from time to time, including in Episode 420. I figure Seth McFarlane is probably the one who writes the song parodies. I do like the “Bag of Weed” song. Since I don’t see FG clips on youtube, they probably don’t share them. The music was from “Me Old Bamboo”, I wish I could dance like that. Lot of energy there.

Oh, almost forgot, try-sexuals, Isaac Asimov wrote “The Gods Themselves” and in it a group of aliens have three sexes instead of two. Yeah Yeah I know, I should call that TRI-sexuals then. But he has an incredibly erotic description of alien masturbation called “Rock-Rubbing”. It takes a leap of imagination to posit a third sex, a really dirty mind to picture alien masturbation, and a sicko like me to get turned on by it.

Cuddling, Every Thing’s Sweetness and Niceness, Until Someone Gets an Erection

My cousin posted that on her Facebook page. Hilarious. And like a lot of humor, being unexpected improves it.

I was reading a blog elsewhere last night, and Arch was describing his first sex teacher {or maybe his favorite sex teacher}. Anyway, he talks about attempting to conceal an erection. Are you happy to see me or do you have a zucchini in your pocket? He didn’t really say zucchini, cucumber, eggplant, nor even German Sausage. He said flashlight. In the U.K. they would refer to that as a torch. So carrying a torch for someone would be a good thing {provided they WANTED to see it.} This kind of brings up the subject of sexual comfort levels. Society has conditioned guys to be basically homophobic, with machismo to cover sexual insecurities. Guys are often afraid of having a hard on around other guys because they don’t want the other guys to suspect them of being gay. At least that’s how I interpret it. But like so many things, it’s more of a continuum. Some people are totally straight some are totally gay, and others fall somewhere in the middle. An interesting question for the homophobic male, do you like porn? Would you like porn where the guy couldn’t get it up? If not, then his erection is important to you. Lesbian sex is a common guy fantasy. Are straight women uncomfortable around lesbians? I think part of the male homophobia includes the fear that a gay guy would hit on you. Reality might be that he’s just not that into you. This one retiree used to avoid an openly gay coworker and that was one reason he would give. Uh, there’s like 30 years age difference, does being straight mean you want sex from ALL women?

Arch was attempting to conceal his erection from a female so most of that doesn’t apply. But then there is the subject of shyness. That ties in with exhibitionism and voyeurism. Like most guys I like to watch. I like to watch porn, I like to watch people in real life. I remember giving talks in a planetarium and showing people stuff through telescopes. After class I remember turning the telescope back towards the dorms. These were 8 inch Celestrons and they didn’t have an image rectifier on them. Everything is upside down and backwards. Which makes it looks really really weird to watch some people having a MFM in front of their window. That particular dorm didn’t often offer much viewing. There were two dorms called towers and in the sides facing the other tower would be voyeurs and exhibitionists. They would put on shows for each other. This was before the internet and the webcams.

Speaking of lesbian porn, the part that always turned me on most was the initial contact. Who touched first, who leaned into the first kiss, who was the first to sexually touch the other. I also like watching the moment of orgasm. I prefer watching that in real life. Porn just doesn’t seem that convincing, but kudos to Peter North for quantities, although that doesn’t fit with lesbian porn.


Tranny Trouble, It may be terminal, Big Dog Siriusly

My car is acting strange. It might be tranny trouble. My mom named all of her cars “Gertie” I don’t know why. I don’t recall ever seeing a Gertrude in the family tree/bush. But this was her car before mine. I tend to think of it as a male. Maybe that’s the problem. It wants to be “Dirty Gertie”. I suppose I’ll have to pull on the dipstick and see how the tranny fluid is. I’ll be getting a new tire for it in the afternoon. I’ll look on line to see what kind of lube my tranny likes. If there’s time I need to renew my DL too. You get 60 days to renew, I’m about half way there.

Big dog Siriusly? Sirius is in Canis Major, big dog.

In one sense we’re all terminal, this toon says it all.



Spoiler Alert — Zymurgy

I don’t read nearly as much as I used to. I was a bit odd in my reading choices too. I never seem to be even about such things. When I took two humanities courses in college I had already read most of the books. I found that stuff interesting. The names were challenging though. And there have been movies made based on several of those books. The Iliad and Odyssey were adventure stories. Anna Karenina, Crime and Punishment, Moby Dick, all good books, and supposedly they burn at Farenheit451. Unusual pathways develop in the brain though. Now when I think of Moby Dick I get a mental picture of one of Furball’s cab customers in a porno. Maybe Menelaus gets Helen in that porno, the name sounds like it. Did Orestes get arrested? Did Tolstoi tell a story? If you get an abridged version of the Iliad, do they scrub the part about Ajax? You can get Trojans at the drug store, where do you get Achaeans? I never made it through Don Quixote. For me it was like read 100 pages, laugh hysterically at the next five, read 100 pages, laugh hysterically at the next five, etc, such is the life of a Knight Errant. Candide lived in the Best Of All Possible Worlds, and even though I haven’t seen it the mind pictures Jack Nicholson in As Good As It Gets.

There is a small galaxy next to the Milky Way that is called Snickers. I’ve heard that the moon named Charon was named by an astronomer who’s wife’s name was Sharon {probably apocryphal and just an urban myth}. The Milky Way was named because it supposedly looked like the milk of Hera. Sometimes I wonder what human milk tastes like. I was breast fed, but it was such a long time ago and I don’t remember it. I do remember a coworker who used a breast pump at work when her child was very young. I never saw her use it, but I remember an extension cord going from the drinking fountain into the ladies room. She had really pretty blue eyes that no one ever looked at because of her great tits. All the women in her family were really hot. When I first started using Facebook, one of her sisters was someone I sent a friend invite to early on. She replied to my e-mail, “Do I know you?” She used to be a coworker too, and I described where and when she would’ve known me. It had been a few years, but she remembered me then.

Those coworkers were probably at least partly Scandinavian. While watching the women’s curling on the Olympics, I noticed the one team looked like blond blue-eyed sisters. That’s what those coworkers look like only with bigger tits. The Ring Trilogy is an 18 hour long opera, PBS aired it on Evening at the Met over the course of three days. Ride of the Valkyries is one of the times when the fat lady sings, but it isn’t over then. While I was in college a friend had some noisy neighbors, so fairly early one Sunday we took his speakers outside and played Ride of the Valkyries quite loudly. Before noon is early to a college student.

Before noon is even earlier to me now. I’ve worked nights almost my entire adulthood. When I graduated, I had applied to be a telescope operator at some of the observatories. It’s probably a good thing I didn’t get those jobs. I found out in the Army that I don’t like mountains. They never had us run AROUND the mountain. It was always up or down.

Happy St Pat’s, I’m off to cook some cabbage.

The title is from a comic strip called Robotman. R-man is reading when Gary walks up and asks him what he’s reading, it’s a dictionary. The plots a bit thin, but he’s wondering how it will end. Gary looks at the last page and says “Zymurgy”. In another part, R-mans friends are coming to visit, and they need directions. R-man hands the phone to Mr Milde. He says, “Do you know where the Cheese King on the corner is? Uh-huh, okay, hey, we’re the third planet from the sun right?” That strip had some good moments.

A Galaxy far far away, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anticenter_shell