Now That’s REALLY Perverse

You ever think about that word, Per-Verse. Per meaning apiece or according to and verse meaning poetry. Maybe the apiece is where they get the deviant meaning. Poetry according to ??? an interesting conjecture. Sapho wrote erotic poetry on the island of Lesbos. I haven’t read any of the poems {I’m not really into Greek 🙂 }, but I’ve heard that they were very romantic poems as well. I don’t consider lesbians as a group as perverse, they’re getting more open about their lifestyle and being accepted as mainstream, and I don’t hear much about modern lesbian poets. I do consider myself as somewhat perverse, I’m a poet and didn’t know it?

I suppose one could write a definition of perverse as it relates to the unexpected, unexplainable, actions of some. In that regard I think of Steve Martin in Father of the Bride. He is sent to the store to get hot dogs and buns. The hot dogs are ten to a package and the buns are eight to a package. Then he flips put and starts ripping open packages. In some ways I shop like a guy, in and out, get it fast then go away. That is not true in grocery stores. I linger over the melons, check to see how firm the cukes and celery are, maybe pick up a tomato, check to see if there is a good pear, and buy a rump roast. I might ask how juicy the sausages are, depends on my mood. If I get that I’ll need Miracle Whip too.

There is one thing that really bugs me at the stores. The trash bags are 30 gal bags. I can’t find any 30 gal trash cans. They’re all 32 gal. What gives? Oh yeah, I need to get condom-mints too. Actually there is a bacon flavored condom.

http://news.yahoo.com/finally-bacon-condom-arrived-133156663.html;_ylt=AjX41zJJ7I0tpNMq7PB8hYOsFWFH;_ylu=X3oDMTQ2OTk0NmdpBG1pdANBcnRpY2xlIFNlY3Rpb24gU2NpZW5jZQRwa2cDN2JjNmY4MjEtMjcxOS0zMTc1LWExZmYtNjhmMDY2N2Y4NTIzBHBvcwM1BHNlYwN0b3Bfc3RvcnlfY29rZQR2ZXIDNWIxY2Y1MzEtOTkzZi0xMWUyLWFkZWUtMzJkZGJmNDE1Mzg1;_ylg=X3oDMTNlZWU2bjE4BGludGwDdXMEbGFuZwNlbi11cwRwc3RhaWQDZjcwODkwYWEtNzI0Zi0zMWY5LWI4M2UtYzlkZjU3ZTlmNzFjBHBzdGNhdANzY2llbmNlBHB0A3N0b3J5cGFnZQR0ZXN0A040VV9ob21lcnVuYXBp;_ylv=3

Hm, I’ll have to preview this. That’s an unusual address.

One of my cousins described our great uncle as being full of piss and vinegar. I thought that was a rather colorful phrase with lots of potential visualizations. I also thought it was a negative description, I was wrong. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=piss%20and%20vinegar

Part of it is negative anyway. Hm, I must’ve posted that link on facebook at some time. Some of my friends liked it. Drinking vinegar is a bit intense, and although vinegar is said to have healthful properties I can’t imagine drinking much of it straight. Some people say piss has healthful benefits too. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urine_therapy

The last part of that page talks about the presence of melatonin in morning piss, and the difficulty of doing a double blind experiment. The mind reels with possible comments to that,{ Hey this doesn’t taste like MY piss! Who’s piss is it?}

I don’t know any poems about drinking piss or vinegar, at the site where I used to blog I did run into a blog with poetry about scat. He didn’t really seem to like visitors or comments. I have noticed that people with fairly extreme fetishes don’t generalize. A person with a leather fetish won’t substitute latex, Emetophiliacs aren’t into other bodily substances as a rule.

I guess I’ll stop before I gross out too many people. Remember, reading about something does not mean you want to do it.

Wild

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “Now That’s REALLY Perverse

  1. Mrs Fever

    I use distilled white vinegar for cleaning. Yesterday, my spouse and I donned our invisible shields and traipsed about the planet of the Walmartians. While there, we picked up some vinegar. And butter. And two shower heads. And two rubber floor mats.

    The cashier looked at us a bit strangely. We just smiled, and said “Nice planet you have here.”

    Like

    Reply
    1. wildoats1962 Post author

      People are always looking at me strangely, just because I buy duct tape, condoms and sominex at the same time. About 15-20 years ago toothpaste pumps were all the rage. It always made me think of other things. After I used up the Crest in one I bought a small 1.5V motor, I put an offset weight on the motor shaft, stuffed it inside the toothpaste tube, added a battery, glued the top on, and made a vibrator. One develops a respect for engineers that can fit motors and gears into small spaces. Yes, I managed to fit it into a Crest tube, but that was the brand with the largest diameter. It was a balancing act between comfort and ease of construction. I’ve also taken canning wax and soaked paper towels in it to make dildos. They’re highly customizable that way. Wax is really soft, but if/when it got damaged, I’d just toss it into a campfire. It’s fun to go out to a park and roast weenies on an open fire. The vibrator didn’t last too long. I had neglected to waterproof the junction between battery compartment and the motor. After it had been washed a half dozen or so times it stopped working.

      Like

      Reply
      1. Mrs Fever

        Well, at least you washed it between uses, Wild. Too bad it broke though.

        When I think of toothpaste tubes and sex toys, I think of CBT. There was a blogger I used to follow at The Other Place who was given “the toothpaste treatment” ~ with cinnamon toothpaste, no less ~ fairly regularly as part of his T&D/CBT regimen.

        Um, OW.

        Like

  2. wildoats1962 Post author

    Any CBT has me cringe. At least for my surgery I was under. They talked about the scope going up, and a little twisted wire thing to grab the stone {which was 10mm all on it’s own}, and an attachment for cutting, my thought was, just how much do you think will fit. Is it going to be all stretched out like an over-pressurized garden hose? Will my pee rate be in gallons per second?

    Like

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s